Decisions

Decisions. Not everyone's favourite thing to do, but someone's gotta do it and its better you than someone else. But how do you know whether its the right or wrong decision?

I think, there isn't any. There's no right and wrong decision. Just easy and hard ones. Both will yield results some better than the other but none wrong. Sure I've made a tonne of decisions I thought was wrong, but if they really were wrong, I don't think I'll be the person I am today. We learn from the decisions we make. There's been times I thought, Oh hell no, I made the wrong choice! And then I realise that the only time I felt this way was when things got rough. Ask me about it today and I'd be able to tell you with a clearer head that I made the perfect decision when I was put in the situation. It made me happy and then somehow things took a turn for the worse and I became miserable. So how can it be a wrong decision if it made me happy? 

Easy decisions somehow make you happy first and then sad. Harder decisions that make you think and think and then force you to make sacrifices somehow make you sad at first but the happiness that comes after lasts a whole lot longer. But see, people being people like doing things in the spur of the moment. We want to be happy. I mean, who doesn't? And that's why we're quick to decide. Its not wrong, but I've come to realise that if we stepped back, thought a bit and then decided, it'll be far better in the long run. Sure it'll be difficult in the beginning. You'll probably be kicking yourself a few times for making the decision. But if you're patient to wait a bit, you'll see that you'll find happiness somehow growing gradually. And it'll keep growing as long as you let it. As long as you think about the long run instead of the temporary happiness it'll bring you now. 

Anyway, as some of you might have guessed, the reason behind this post is that I made a decision too. I made an easy decision recently without thinking thoroughly and I was on top of the world. I was all, I'll cross the bridge when I get to it. Suddenly I'm now rock bottom and I don't know how to cross the freaking bridge. So I made a decision that was extremely difficult. And really, all I'm trying to do now is to convince myself that everything will be okay. I have faith that it will be. I have faith and "farlings" that care so deeply about me that I know for a fact this time my decision will bear better fruit, so to speak. 

Coming back to the topic at hand, decisions however difficult it may be is never right or wrong. They just give different results and we learn from these. Only when we stop learning from our experiences have we made the wrong decision. I've learnt from mine. Painfully no doubt, but I have learnt it well. 

So I'll tell you honestly. Right now, even though I feel like I've messed up big time, in time I'll see that these feelings won't compare to the happiness I'll feel then. 

In Pursuit of HappYness

Movies, book, songs etc. always makes it seem as if happiness is a definite thing or something you might find at the end of a long time struggle. Even people always say "Oh, don't worry, you might be feeling this way now but it'll all go away soon enough and then you'll be happy." Really? Will I? Will it all just 'go away'? Or is happiness just something temporary? Like every other thing life has to offer? Is happiness really something where when you get it, you have it till the day you die?

What I think is that happiness comes and goes like the wind. You're never always struggling and neither will you always be happy. And it has absolutely nothing to do with your horoscope either. I'm sorry to say that but it just doesn't. The only thing that determines how happy you will be or how long you will be depends on the kind of decisions you choose to make in different but ordinary situations. If you would rather just sit in wallow in self-pity, even a blind man could see how happy you are or will ever be.

Then again, nobody is perfect and nobody makes the right decisions all the time. In the first place, there's is no right or wrong decision. Different decisions give different results, some better than the other. The point is, happiness really isn't something we were meant to pursue. It's more of something we should maintain. It has always been there staring at us. It could just slap us in the face and we would still not know about it! Some of us are just a bit blur that way, I guess. We should take advantage of the situation that's bringing us down instead of letting the situation take control over us.

Last Saturday at mass (at SFA, man I love that church!), the priest gave this story about this girl, Alice.

"One day, Alice was complaining to her dad about some problems she was facing. Being a chef, he then led her to the kitchen to try to calm her down using food. He put 3 pots of water onto the stove and started boiling them. In one pot, he put carrots, in the other eggs and in the third ground coffee. After about half an hour or so, he scooped out the carrots. He showed Alice how soft they had become. He explained to Alice that the water symbolized the problem.

After being in the water, the carrots became very soft and fell apart easily. He added that we should not let the problem turn us soft or gullible (or something like that..). Then he took out the eggs. He showed Alice how hard the eggs had become. He said that sometimes our problems turn our hearts hard. So much so it becomes hard for us to accept differences or to set aside our differences. Again, we should not let the problem do this to us. Finally he poured a little of the coffee into a cup and gave it to Alice. He said that we should be like the coffee. Although the problem did change us a little, we took advantage of the problem and turn it around to suit us. It was now no longer a problem."

In a nutshell, I think, no no.. I believe, that happiness is not something that was meant to be pursued but rather something that was meant to be maintained. It is temporary. But happiness is everywhere. You're just not looking hard enough. Be happy the you woke up this morning, be happy the sun is shinning, be happy you can actually see the sun. Then again, this is just my view on happiness. I don't know how you lot feel about it, but yea. I guess different people think differently. What I may think about happiness can or may seem like utter rubbish to you. But...... this is my blog so, too bad! Haha.

So, did Snow White, Cinderella and Chris Gardner 'live happily ever after'? I doubt it.